Today I remembered the first time it happened.

I was sparring against Pat.

Bastard. I've seen him bully his little bro so many times. Made him cry. He's older, than me, but less experienced. Probably thinks he can bully me too, but he's not sure. He's probably going to test this by going extremely offensive at first.

The command, then bow. We both ready stance and yell.

He comes on with a barrage of front and turning kicks. But I'm ready. I keep shifting to the sides to throw his attack vector off while executing a few reversals in-between.

After swapping attacker/defender roles for awhile there's a slight pause. I check his stance and body language. Mid bend in knees with constant tension, neutral balance from left to right foot, eyes on my centre. Classic reversal stance.

Son of a? Reversal is my specialty you bastard, you think you can out-reversal me?

I mirror his stance to challenge him. Neither of us moves.

Moments pass and still no motion.

Idiot. Fine, but its easy to feign a response out of a noob reversaler.

I feint with a thurst step forward and see him quickly drop his CG before stopping himself upon realization of my intention.

Give him 2-3 times and he'll get the point and be forced to take action.

2nd time, 3rd time, 4th time, stupid patient bastard. 5th time.

I see the extension, now or never.

I'll show him a reversal he would never have dreamed off. The aerial shift turning kick. Unlike my usual specialty shift turning kick, this move that I came up with comprised of a high jump instead of a shift, adding more torque to the torso.

During practice I blew the arm shield right off the holder with this kick, but I only have enough energy to execute it 3 times in full force before hitting my limit.

3 tries is more than enough, cause I only need one now.

His kick comes in as I begin my flight to the side. Time seems to slow down as I'm floating in the air targetting him while my right leg swings backward, then snaps forward toward his chest.

Hit.

It was a snap blow instead of a driving blow so it only forces him to stumble back a few steps.

He lowers his guard and holds his hand out to me to stop. I can see from his eyes that he's probably seeing spots.

He moves back abit, then drops down into a sit.

He was lucky that he was exhaling during the impact.

"You okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, gimme a minute." He replies. "Walau, you hit so hard."

You got screwed over, losah!





Instead of feeling bits and pieces of his thoughts, today I was looking through his eyes instead, in awe. For once in a very long time.

Its amazing.

How far and deep he can look into each person. Divulging their innermost fears and secrets to me. His readings, though cynical, are thorough and accurate.

I guess I was wrong to think that it would go away by sealing him off.

I cannot afford to let him destroy my ties with everyone around me again.

The information he gathers is only useful for one thing. And being up there in the past felt good for awhile, but its sickening, and solitary.


I will find a way.