Whew... alots been happening this week...

The infection has cleared out of my lungs hoorah.

But now have a throat infection.

And the cough is worse.

But can still manage. Hell, managed to do circuit today with relative breathing ease. I notice during training I don't feel like coughing, but relaxing or standing doing nothing then it comes.

Upon further analysis my conclusion is that when I am exerting myself and breathing heavily the pressure of air entering and exiting is relatively higher. In contrast to the low pressure which would allow by throat to get irritated.




I can't believe I left my damn PT at home today! Had to use my super secret emergency backup auxilliary secondary singlet which is.... damn tight. And borrowed delvin's shorts.. which I had to change out of during weights for fear of ripping them whilst doing squats.

Piang....

I'm going to plant more super secret emergency backup auxilliary secondary PT in my secret place on friday just in case.

Oh we did circuit today. Haha fun!

Bugger complained about my situps, then he also never come up fully bwahahahaha. :X




Then alot of the guys studies are in turmoil.... I've never seen such a large majority of the guys having problems with studies. So, good news is, ITS A NEW LANDMARK!! Bad news is, well, thats just not healthy.

Time management and discipline needs to be checked I guess. But, have faith that they'll sort it out. Plus its a little known fact that alot of lecturers/teachers like to give SHOCK therapy to their students to fail on a large majority and WAKE UP THEIR IDEA so that they do better for the examinations.






Well, on tuesday after rowing got a call.
The school wants me to play for Prince Edward during his visit next monday. Err... whats such an old guy still doing as a "prince"? Haiz....

Picked "The Successor" and "Melodies of Life".

Its amazing how my style has evolved somewhat since year one. I played "The Successor" For my very first concert in my first year. Yimei also asked if I could play for the piano ensemble concert next tuesday. So I guess I might as well play those too as well.

This entry will be abit messed up because I'm not looking at the screen right now to type this.

Stupid monitor went crazy on friday.... really retarded.... the resolution constantly changes everytime something new ppears on screen.

Right now its fricking blur and making me dizzy just to look at it. I suppose its about time the damned thing went bust anyway, its ancient and has been through extreme conditioning testing thanks to me.....

So anyway this minor lung infection is more or less ok.... it just gets irritated for no reason every now and then. I suppose the whole pot of herbal soup which mom cokoed for me on fri helped somewhat.... But I wonder if drinking the whole pot is overdoing it....

I rock, I think I've made only a few typing mistakes so far without looking at the screen. Met up with the dwarf and bilbo yesterday. We went to watch resident evil: apocalypse. Even though I was having a headache and was coughing. Then the dwarf was coughing worse haha. Poor dwarf.

RE: Apocalypse rocks! It was nice seeing Jill in her trademark blue tube top, and alice is really cool. Only thing is those poor girls look like they haven't eaten anything in days.... So sad how things turned out with Max and Nemisis.

Went to bishan gym before that with the dwarf. His gym is still very scary.. but still can qie haha.


Training today was ok, viola! The coughing didn't act up too badly during training! Hahaha only when I got home. doh.

Now I wonder if I should continue playing star ocean on this POS monitor and kill my eyes or find something else to do.

Anyway, tomorrow morning marks the start of my new secret training programme hahaha.

Woooo scaaary....

Coughing abit.....

My bronchioles are in turmoil... and today had a slight fever during training.

Felt damn tired. Almost died.

Blarhg.

Star ocean rocks.

Rowed 13km yesterday....

And....

I CAN PLAY CHINESE!!! hahahaha
http://www.reubenkee.com/music/singles/A%20Hero%20Enters.mp3

Star Ocean is awesome so far. Its been so long since I've actually been able to get involved in an rpg. Battles are awesome simply due to the fact that moving and attacking are completely simultaneous, which is something new that tri-ace introduced to the first few rpgs it produced and it works really well.

Not like almost every other rpg since Final Fantasy I which uses turn based monotonous pacing.




Went to school to do weights, then went to watch Kitaro live.

Saw the Prime Minister and his wife during the interlude walking over and queing up to buy the dvd/programme booklet with the body guards.

Had such a weird thought....

3 Body guards close to the PM, another 2 ghosting somewhere from the exterior, 2 policemen guarding the west exit, 3 policemen on patrol... sensed another body guard but didn't manage to see... probably trailing them.

If an assasination attempt were made the culprit could have easily, attempted it right there and made for the east exit which was unguarded. Or, roped down from the centre balcony drop.




Anyway Kitaro plays with... such emotion.... its as if it is almost religious to him, or probably some listeners. HIS BAND is pretty awesome. The female violinist wore a outfit, and the female keyboardist.... but the female percussionist... omgomgomg.... she wore this black dress.... exposing her upper chest and shoulders.... it was so gu niang.... like what gu niangs wear to party's and the only exertive action they would do is take a drink from a pricey glass.

BUT when she started to WACK the timpanis!!!

Holy shit.

I have never ever seen a GUY hit the timpanis and xylophones at that speed and force, and the crescendos.... all in that little dress... and with such grace...


Anyway what I've learnt today is that it must feel damn good to WACK a timpani.

yeah.

Mom's been too free this morning....


and she's been in my room.........




and everything is disgustingly neat and tidy now......



and I can't find my stuff ;_;




Sun was bloody hot today during training ah. Poor Mike was stoning throughout rowing. I wonder what made him drag himself down after the drinking session when the rest of them were mia.



Finally bought star ocean: till the end of time.

The rest of today will be devoted to the appreciation of square enix's masterpiece.

Went to watch The great challenge just now with the alumni gang....

All I can say after watching that show is.... wtf?

Everyone's bouncing the hell everywhere and falling here and there but landing lightly....

Some parts of the plot are just really lame....



Don't feel like logging much nowadays. I suppose its childish to expect everyone to behave in a proper manner or understand things from another perspective.

Ran 5km at midnight on friday. Now I know why the heck my right shin hurt when I ran along the canal last time....

The bloody canal is tilted at a 10 degree angle!!!! That means that if you are running to bishan park, the ground on your right will be higher than the ground on your left.

Wth? Its supposed to be a favourite running spot also loh.... whatever it is, I'm not running along there again.

Learning to multitask....

Sometimes I wonder if I can really cover all bases.

Trying to come up with ways to add some fun into training, or help coordination, while maintaining the standard. Then pulling the energy together to execute.

Trying to motivate and encourage. Trying to be a friend.

Trying to make peace between groups.

But then I found out that some of them aren't getting along. And some of them don't click and feel left out. And some of them are so unobservant/insensitive that they don't know that they ostracize, and some of them do not see the others who are just like them.

And then bugger won't reply sms or email. But found out he's on mc doh.


And then I find out some people have reservations for the next exco addition. And i found out that some people actually look down on other people to such an extent.





Why do I even bother trying to make things right. When they don't respect each other. When they think that they are better. When they do not respect this team.

What shortcoming is blinding them and drowning out their own self awareness and is making them afraid to show humility.






I REALLY want to know.

I'm about ready to get back to doing some creative work after a nice break to UO.

Had "fun" training today. Yeap, quite fun lah haha, did circuit and paddle drills. The guys came up with yet another cheer about me.... dunno if I should be glad or lay the smackdown on them haha.

Went to yoshinoya for dinner after that with them haha. MMmmmm........

The shoes really are awesome, fascilitates for better running form somehow.

Saw Jackson today. I guess a part of me still resents him for that race. But in the end it is through other people's weaknesses, or strengths that the observer learns from. Nevertheless it was still nice to see him and Jem.

I find 3d games kinda put me off a little....

Hate it when companies go for the "in" thing. 2D graphics can rock too, you know?

Saturday:

Wake up, play Ultima online, chat, eat, nap, play, eat sleep.

Vunderbar!



Today was a pretty tiring day.

Tried to skip breakfast in the morning and oh boy, shouldn't have done that...

Firstly during canoeing went to chase dragonboats again, and one ntu k1 tried to chase me haha. Damn funny lah that guy, must pace with him again soon.

Then felt really drained, knew I'd be in trouble during dragonboat later so I chugged down my endurox right before dragonboat.

And woohoo, hit a sugar wall soon after. Actually it didn't help, because it may help to recover, but doesn't give much energy at all.

So training today was extra challenging haha.

Right now i just feel like going to my bed, hugging my pillow, taking a deep breath in and slowly letting it out....

Wore Mr Bowerman's "state of the art" running shoes today. Supposedly the "best running shoes" on the market now, but salespersons like to bs alot haha.

This co-founder of Nike is supposedly some genious coach or something.. but haha I've never wore anything like this before.

Firstly, due to the front breathable mesh my feet felt damn cold when I was walking around... until I got stomache ache haha wtf? Or maybe it was the fish...

This card has alot of interesting stuff... lemme log this down:
1. Breathable mesh and synthetic leather overlays to enhance support and flexibility with internal midfoot radial band quarter straps for extra midfoot support.

2. Anatomically molded sockliner for footbed support.

3. Blow-molded heel Air-Sole and flexible forefoot Air-Sole units for optimal cushioning plus softer Phylon in the forefoot and Poron in the heel above the Air-Sole units for additinoal cushioning.

4. Dual density polyurethane heel for added support and Phylon forefoot contributes to overall cushioning and flexibility.

5. TPU shank for midfoot rigidity and support.

6. BRS1000 carbon rubber in the heel for durability. Duralon rubber with flex grooves in the forefoot to encourage a smooth, more natural footstrike motion.

Poron is a registered trademark of Rogers Corporation.



Have you ever come across a shoe with that much crap behind it? If 10% of it was true I'm in good hands already hahaha. I can't believe I typed all that out this is lame...

Wore Mr Bowerman's "state of the art" running shoes today. Supposedly the "best running shoes" on the market now, but salespersons like to bs alot haha.

This co-founder of Nike is supposedly some genious coach or something.. but haha I've never wore anything like this before.

Firstly, due to the front breathable mesh my feet felt damn cold when I was walking around... until I got stomache ache haha wtf? Or maybe it was the fish...

This card has alot of interesting stuff... lemme log this down:

1. Breathable mesh and synthetic leather overlays to enhance support and flexibility with internal midfoot radial band quarter straps for extra midfoot support.

2. Anatomically molded sockliner for footbed support.

3. Blow-molded heel Air-Sole and flexible forefoot Air-Sole units for optimal cushioning plus softer Phylon in the forefoot and Poron in the heel above the Air-Sole units for additinoal cushioning.

4. Dual density polyurethane heel for added support and Phylon forefoot contributes to overall cushioning and flexibility.

5. TPU shank for midfoot rigidity and support.

6. BRS1000 carbon rubber in the heel for durability. Duralon rubber with flex grooves in the forefoot to encourage a smooth, more natural footstrike motion.

Poron is a registered trademark of Rogers Corporation.



Have you ever come across a shoe with that much crap behind it? If 10% of it was true I'm in good hands already hahaha. I can't believe I typed all that out this is lame...

Eargh... at last.

http://www.reubenkee.com/music/singles/Tides%20That%20Bind.mp3

Now to see what the client says about this.

Hohohoh Kimchi tastes best when its past the expiration date!

Finished the bottle liao... shit, no more. 1am, still wide awake.

I really need to kick myself the next time I want to take an afternoon nap... I should play Suikoden.... always fall asleep within 20 minutes of playing that game for some reason.

Musical block....

I find that when I look at a script and try to think of music to accentuate the desired moods I get stumped.... very often. Or come up with shitty crappy ideas.

Haiz.... mind wrecking... trying to come up with the theme sequence for the GCC, which is supposed to be some big event in singapore... stress.... Finally decided on a melody, reusing reminiscence, because it sounds empowering, which is what the whole trailer is about, actually.

Went to school to train with Yixue, did 10 sets of 10 pullups + 20 situps + 10 jack-knives, for a nice 100 pullups, 200 situps and 100 jack-knives. Supported him for the last 3-4 sets only.

Then did weights.

The bugger complained at first haha, saying I'm crazy making us do stuff tougher than NJ's training. But can see he's trying harder than last time for some reason.... I wonder why.

After training he went to shower, then I saw the tag, heh. I miss the days when I was trying to catch up with Hong during extra training somehow. I remember the day that we decided to head down to beach road to look for the tag and chain... we thought it was pretty cool haha. Searched all over beach road and golden mile complex and got countless redirects from building to building to get that special smooth edged rectangle shape, not the circular one the SAF gives out. We wanted to get the tags to show the team, then maybe we all would get it.

I wonder why the plan wasn't carried out fully in the end. Maybe the new exco wasn't so on about the sort of thing. But we still wore it everyday back then, hahaha.

Now that he's not around anymore there's no point wearing it actually, I just keep it around close. He still checks in on occasionally, a couple of weeks back he gave me some books to make sure I'm leading our team right, haha. Si dunbai.

Went rowing in the morning today, paced around with a couple of boats.

My stroke has changed drastically over the past few weeks. I suppose once the stress of having to train for nationals was alleviated I've found more freedom to take my time and work on my technique.

Sensei said it improved too, will be entering the power phase soon, whew... that's the hardest, but still fun haha.

Had DB training after that... guys response was alot better today. Focus improving, still need to work on the stroke though.

Went to GMEC for lunch, alot of us eating more healthily after the camp hahahahaha. Thomas jr still went and ate laksa though, doh!

Went home and slacked around till we went to uncle ron's place for dinner.

BBQ'd steak. Haha, damn unhealthy... but nice.

In future, food gatherings at my house will consist of a large pot of soup instead of a fire pit, whereby people could dump their delicious chicken/fish slices, fishballs and sausages in. The food would then not burn, and fill with many cancer causing agents, instead it will be nicely boiled or steamed perfectly, adding to the wonderful soup which we would partake in later.


Speaking of beef, the family ate at some supposedly fine dining western place or something the other day. My god! The beef and salmon portions were so friggin tiny!

And they say such culinary habits originated from the westerners!? I thought that they ate alot! Only old men and women would get full on something like that...

Maybe thats why only really rich people go for stuff like that? And actually order.... several main courses, like a course of chicken, then beef, then salmon. Ahhh that would be somewhat filling.

Ling thought I was feeling sad... haha.

I don't know when was the last time I ever confided or shared any problems with anyone. Perhaps somewhere along the line I've seen to many people telling of their problems or thoughts, but not doing a damned thing about it.

If there's a problem, they feel bad at first, then they tell someone about it, hooray, they feel better. But guess what? The problem is still there. Or even better, they try to console themselves, whether through "religious" acceptance or simply classifying themselves to be what they are.

So yeah, I've learnt to think about things myself. The best person who knows you, is you, afterall. To see things in different perspectives, to decide on what is the best course of action to take. Sometimes its hard, sometimes its gotten so easy that an analysis of the situation is carried out by the subconscious, and only the solution presented to the whole mind.






Went down to kallang late today.... Thought that samantha would be using Cougar, so I'd take over late, in the end she had a sore throat and didn't go down doh...

Managed to do some data collection on the other teams too. Very interesting...

I've got high hopes for that team...

In a way their situation is very similar to ours. So a part of my hope for us also goes out to that team.

Wednesday and thursday was the first time I had attempted to run a camp with Jo. The time spent planning with the exco paid off, although some improvisation had to be made.

Well, I think we all got to know each other a little better. Perhaps the camp gave me some new insights as to what it means to be where I am too. One would think that leading a team would be all about courage, strength, fire, and all the heroic nonsense they would make you believe on tv...

But I've felt worry, when I see them unable to keep a clear mind.

And I've felt pain, when they come up and tell me that they feel ostracized from the group, when they feel like they don't belong, and don't fit in.

Its sad that we need to feel accepted. Even if sometimes we need to accept ourselves first.

Its sad that those in their own groups do not see the pain in that individual who is looking at them.

Perhaps I understand how they feel, in more ways than one. I had always flown solo, I have never confided my worries or thoughts to anyone, ever since secondary school. If Hong hadn't decided to guide me and train me during my second year, perhaps I would have left? Ahhh but I remember now. I stayed because I wanted to beat them. But yet he helped me. We're all in this team for our own reasons. They change over time. Sometimes you want to be with other people, sometimes you just want to beat them and show that you're better. Sometimes you wish they'd just work as a team.

And seeing him that day, that over-competitiveness... it looked oh so familiar. I remember the times that I had played a game and didn't think of anything else except to win. Except to get that point. It tore me up inside when I lost. I felt angry, I felt hate. But now I wonder if I had actually grown up and became a more thoughtful player, or did I let my fighting spirit die down somewhat inside of me.

The heart and mind are forever in conflict. When the heart takes too much lead, we become reckless, we become a danger to ourselves and others. When the mind takes too much lead, we become complacent, we second guess ourselves and others. Once again I am reminded that everything requires a balance, to concentrate and yield that power. To give if focus and direction.

I knew once the decision was made, that I would not be able to train as often as I wanted in the k1 to make it for that goal. Sometimes I dare not think if it was worth it or not.

But when they are getting along, it eases my heart a little.