Of all the genre's I've tackled this year... hip hop, trip hop, rock, jazz, orchestral, electronica, drum and bass, house, jungle, techno, trance, ethnic, funk and everything inbetween... the simplest and most minimal - orchestrated horror has got to be the hardest yet.

Difficult to try to pour fear into an arrangement when you're so good at blocking it out and its so difficult to feel it.


Went back to visit nyp today to discuss next year's dance musical designs. They bought a new baby grand and 3 upright pianos. Which is nice for a trio baby grand piano performance or something along with the existing 2 baby grands, but I'd still prefer if they bought a decent long grand piano.

Walking through school, you remember how promiscuous some girls are, and how daring others are. When a group of fags look at me like that I can ignore them because I know that any time I'd beat the living jesus out of them if they try something stupid. But when a group of girls do, and when one of them is hawt... you slightly forget if you're posture is straight or not.

It was nice taking the elevator up to the student affairs office. The club rooms didn't change much. For the few "elite" and "talented" enough to be accepted into the various clubs and have access to the rooms, block E was where you could hang out and find solace.

Many times I would sneak away during break or class and draw the key into the piano room where that large black baby grand piano waited for me. Even with the doors closed and locked you could hear a little of what the person was playing inside the room. And the air conditioning vents were linked to the girls toilet which was right beside the room.

When you finished playing a piece, and a girl comes out of the toilet after a long absence, you know she's been in there listening to you.

Because more often than not, they think that they've made a connection, and give you a certain look through the glass windows. More daring ones will knock on the panes and ask if there is any upcoming concert. I welcomed the company. It was fascinating to see such reactions to my music.

The reverb inside that medium sized room resonates the sound of the piano so subtlety yet sufficiently to provide a profound ambiance of each crescendo. It was there in that room, that I dared to play my loudest, and felt my music the strongest, because as I played my pieces, the room would mirror back each expression to me at different angles.



I guess you could say that I owe the school so much because it provided me with the opportunities to grow in such profound ways, instead of just going off to slack somewhere or walk around aimlessly.

I was nervous as hell for my first concert, but performance after performance, I soon felt no fear performing in front of 3000+ people in the auditorium for the school's anniversary musicals. It was a level up of nerve control from minding the slightest chair squeek, to being able to smile when a group of charbohs screams your name when you touch the piano keys.

I learned a very important lesson through each performance:
It needs to come in the confidence of your own performance. Doubt yourself, and you'll worry about what they'd think. But know that you'll own the shit out of them with your performance, and you won't have to worry about a thing.

Goes the same about many things in life, eh?