Tonight's run: 12:05 mins

Worse timing in forever. But it was good. Despite the aches from kicking and screaming and rowing and cramps. I can't remember when was the last time I dared to run so hard and just die out instead of maintaining properly for the run. Not caring.

And faintly, somewhere inside my head, I heard 'his' voice.

The one I tried so hard to block out, that after awhile, he eventually became soft to the point of silent.

Its scary. Because they might think that the dog might be scary in some ways. But they haven't seen shit until they saw him.

And I see so much potential in the dog, because I recognize so much of that in what I was so long ago. He's luckier in so many ways, though.

I can't say that I was suprised in the result of the partner. This was what I suspected, and the pairing would be more optimal.




As for results. I've never been more proud and dissapointed/pissed at the same time.

In a fair race with PROPER LANES, STANDARDIZED BOATS and UNBIASED CURRENT, the teams that rode on lady luck's smile today wouldn't be too happy.

Teams that should have won, didn't. Teams that were 'wtf' standard, did. And teams of 'ok' standard that rode on luck and pulled through.

I don't know why the community continues to support this kind of screwed up races, but I guess its just another stupid screwed up traditional race which we all accept to be screwed up and just go and try our luck in.

Worse is when those who don't know any better, those who do not understand the waters and conditions, actually consider it a fair race, and take the results for face value.

This race result is a celebration of luck.

It was so hard not being able to tell them some things. When the equation works out to be so screwed up because of the godamn variable, but you can only hope and pray for a miracle.

They had a 10 degree wash advantage and we beat them. But once they had more of an advantage, we couldn't make up.

I suppose we still weren't good enough if we couldn't make up for the handicap.











But in the end, I found the team that I always wanted.

Why does it always take a crappy race for me to wake up.