So I've come to the conclusion that over the past few days, I've had a sleep dept, which led to some... complications over my perspectives.

Ugh...

On weekdays: Going back and forth camp all the way at the end of singapore + nteam trainings at night, after which I rush home to eat, shower and sleep asap to try and catch at least 6 hours of sleep.

On weekends: Saturday morning, gotta report to camp by 745am, then training in the afternoon till 7pm, eat, reach home at about 9pm, shower, relax for abour 1-2 hours, try and catch at least 6-7 hours of sleep because on sunday morning there's training at 9am at kallang, that means wake up at about 7am.

I'm going mad I'm going mad.

Really need to take some breaks from training, or else this sleep dept is going to drive me bonkers.

I was so screwed up till I've been contemplating whether it was a good idea to downgrade or not. And whether I should upgrade or not. The possibility to get my sergeant rank is still there.

I still remember the time where I almost signed 5 years of my life away to the red berets.

Its stupid to say that that is a shallow goal about ego and 'honor'. Combatants always seem more garang. It would be hypocritical. Because one could say the exact same thing about joining the team for dragonboat.

Perhaps I just need some balance in life. Maybe thats why Clark Kent had a calm day job. He needed the emotional balance for his hectic alter-ego life.

Perhaps only by having contrast, one can see the balance, and the harmony. Being overwhelmed in either side is to be blind.




Ran to Bishan gym to do stupid ergo just now. Damnit why do I suck so bad at it?! Timing was 3:30mins for 1km. Which is a... fail grade by 1 sec. Shit! Getting there, getting there. Then I ran back home.

Working on some music now. Finally got an interesting idea on how to arrange "training to be soldiers". This is going to rock haha.