Went for a run just now.

Yes, I'm supposed to be on break, holiday, off-season rest, whatever. But... feel like shit lah... late get fat then die.

Anyway ran 4k. Yeah, damn slack right, used to do 5k.


Was talking to him on friday. The more I talked to him, the more I knew that this was the one that would take up that position in an awesome manner, and I could foresee him leading them in much like I would like to.

I look at my wallet nowadays, and am constantly reminded that so soon, that burden shall be liften off and passed to another. The half broken dragon keychain will be carried by another. But ironically, the work doesn't end so soon for me. There is yet some amount of guidance and support I must give before I sum up my role in the team.

Mixed feeling, really.

At the start of the semester, I was sad that I had to give up that dream, in order to fulfill my promise to Ben, and to Hong.

Then came the endless nights of worrying, about how we could help the team to climb up slowly from its rock-bottom state.

And that's no exaggeration. We had a mere handful of seniors, there was conflict among them, and the last race had left many demoralized and many had thought of leaving.

In a way, the worrying never stops, maybe it won't until I finally leave.

Discipline, morale, team spirit, the camp, fellowship, conflicts, respect, the race preperations, the race... It seemed like it would never end.

I remembered a time when I grew so tired. Then, it subsided.

And now, although part of me would like things to continue, I know that its better this way.

Soon, I will be able to pursue that dream which I had given up previously.

And although I know it will hurt to severe my ties with them.

I know all too well the consequences of holding on to the past.




It prevents you from moving on - Too many times I have seen it affect the people around me.



Well, there's yet some work to do before that anyway.

Tomorrow I will put him through 'that' program.

Just as Hong did to me two years ago.

I hope that the memories of it will provide him with the courage as it did for me at times.