So once again I find myself facing a dilemna.

Planning for the future can be such a pain in the ass sometimes.

Now as its time to leave school, and time to head to Tekong, I wonder I should set out to do?

In retrospect, had I not joined dragonboat 3 years ago, I would probably still be a Pes B underweight, low haemogoblined, napfa-failing wuss. But now I'm a Pes A, have normal blood thank god, and can secure a gold for napfa, and I wonder where this can take me?

Should I chiong in NS, pursue the red beret and call myself a commando, or head to OCS? More retarded training for some pride? Is it worth it at all? That would mean I would have alot less time to work on my music and games, less time for dragonboat if I even get in the team in there and my OC doesn't let me off.

Or should I downgrade? It would be too easy. But then I'd be able to book out more often, more time for everything, more time for training, for canoeing, and even more time for the SAFSA dragonboat team. But that would mean that I could've done that in the first place had I not joined the team in year one.

Overheard a couple of SOF and commando dragonboaters earlier in morning at kallang. They were talking about all the propaganda that mindef is placing all over singapore to get people to sign on.
"Challenge yourself, they say."
"I think that if you can challenge yourself in NS you can challenge yourself in more worthwhile things out in life."
"Sure they will send you for upgrading, or move you up the ranks if you sign on, but if you go outside and work you can be better qualified for the future."

But unlike the secondary four crossroads, there are several more perspective at this juncture.

A: Prestige versus interest
1. Should I do the more prestigious thing?
2. Should I pursue my interest?

B: Pride and honor
1. Should I pursue pride?
2. Should I be a wuss and take the easy way out?

C: Challenge
1. Should I challenge myself physically and mentally?
2. Should I challenge myself creatively?

Uncertainties:
If I do chiong, what if my knee and ankle acts up during training? And I'll have less time for music, may miss out on important opportunities.

At the last juncture I chose to pursue my interest. Not sure if I should repeat that choice now.