Work in the morning, fight fire in camp via sms, shopping spree, gym with the moose, then watched pandora's lab with moose, chris and his bro at vivo. Frickin tiring day la.

Just got back from a run to prata house and back. It was nice having someone to run that route with again.

Talked a hell lot with him. Funny stuff happens sometimes with dog and moose and they say if Nitek was here, he would this vulgar thing, or that satanic thing haha. Kinda like talking and missing him as if he's dead. But when one of us disappears suddenly, its about the equivalent of it.

Was talking to moose about indiv sports and team sports. Perhaps its my fault for not bonding the team closer. It hurt too much when I left the school team, and I just couldn't bring myself to commit to this team, and couldn't unite the team as well as the last.

I'm a hypocrite. I feel sorry for someone because he's trying to cut himself away from the hurt when I myself am doing it despite telling myself time and time again that running away is never the solution.

Before each fight, the fear was mine to bear. When I was on top, I was alone. With the team, I had brothers to bear the fear with, and brothers to share the joy with.