Tonite's run down the usual route: 12:27mins

Still shitty as hell. But I have an excuse for tonite. It just rained and the ground was frickin slippery so I had to take careful steps while compromising on the speed to prevent skidding.

Listening to darkstar one soundtrack while running = sugoi

Decided to level up my drug intake for just awhile to see if it really works. Haha. As much research and studies I have looked into, I'll never know till I try, eh?




Problems with the junior exco.... think I may have to play asshole tomorrow. Cause it seems the only way to wake him up, as much as I would hate to. Should have known I'd have to from the start already, since he's so much like jw and it took the asshole method to get his act together. Sigh. Sometimes mentoring can be such a pain in the ass. But I gotta do it.

Doesn't matter how well you lead a team if you leave and they fall to shit. Then you'll only have boosted your precious ego and not have taught them squat.

Was it a bad move? It was the most optimal at that point in time. Its never easy looking for potential leaders or trying to mentor them. Den was one in a million. A part of me wishes that he would just hurry and join saf sa right now. But I know he's still adamant on keeping that promise to me to look after my team for me.

He's so silly that way, but that also makes him the most dependable and worthy. He's probably the only one who could grasp that concept so easily.

Would butcher have been a better choice for one of the slots? With dog, no better. With wz, better off in some ways, worse off in some ways. Quite a tie actually.

But there's one critical point that he failed to meet when I was testing each of them. That day during pullups I challenged him to make me accountable for my form and performance with the hope that he would in turn be accountable for his own. Which is one of the most important perspectives to keep in mind. But he missed it. IQ wise there, EQ wise, still some way to go. I gave him the chance to challenge my vulnerability in hopes that he will realize his own. But when I sealed mine, he didn't seal his. You can't lead core training sets if you're dying throughout russian twists, leg raises, etc etc, after all.

At least dog could grasp this. Which is why he seemed more ready. But everyone with some form of ambition always thinks that they can do it until they actually go and try. Some things you can never learn by watching nor speculation.

XS was right. Its never healthy when all the seniors just suddenly disappear. The younger ones will see too much room for them to spread their wings.

Maybe I'm expecting too much from them. No one succeeds on their first try, anyway. No one.