Last night's run: 20 mins. I guess the short stride length was a little pressuring to the knees. Ate alot... huhuhu.

Back with the team today at last, to find out what is going on.

Despite the huge mess, its good to see some form of order and movement surfacing.

I guess I had to be away for the dog to finally open his wings. This makes me wonder if me staying on would hamper his further development.

Ultimately I just want to make sure that they can go on without me. Dependency is one of the rules of power, but I really don't care about that anymore. Sometimes there are bigger things.

The exco really is an amusing bunch.

First night back with nteam too. Now that I've had both teams merge, its even easier for me to leave things in nasi's hands.

Went to ksl after training at night for duckrice and shared a plate of damn awesome but oily carrot cake with Alvin. Yumm....

I don't know if I should stay. The prestige of being in the 'natio nal team' doesn't appeal anymore. Partly because I've represented the country before anyway and single handedly spent more of the government's money on that trip than an entire team for the sea games.

But the main reason is that if I stay, I'll be starting the cycle all over again, and quite frankly this is a game that isn't worth replaying that many times.

Only thing would be the team. But right now I feel like being a loner for awhile.

Maybe I just need more time to think things through.

Alright, the media is starting to cash in on the whole contest and on me. Reports coming in from everything about radio and tv stations and papers. I wish I actually watched tv, listened to the radio or read papers...

Hossan Leong on power 98 seems to have slammed all the guys... even in the context of comedy... if I see him down the street he will gg.

Then just now jean denker said I have a nice bod and abs, but am not metrosexual.

Main Entry: metrosexual
Part of Speech: n, adj
Definition: a heterosexual male who has a strong aesthetic sense and inordinate interest in appearance and style, similar to that of homosexual males
Etymology: 1994; blend of metropolitan + heterosexual

Like whoa... I don't want to be metrosexual so... go jean go! I won't say that you're short anymore.


Went canoeing just now, at last. The water felt so good. Wanted to drop by the old chicken rice stall at bendemeer but... its gone :(

I remember the days when I would go to kallang from school, then drop by that stall after rowing.

There was one sunday I rowed from 8am to 7pm, doing lond d sets, mid d sets, sprints, everything over and over to try and get my water sense up asap... and ended up spraining my lungs. Yeah, you can sprain your lungs, and it hurt when I breathed in too deeply... and I almost coughed up each spoon of chicken rice.

Ahhh those were the good old days... some painful, but still good haha.

Felt so re-energized today, despite the serious lack of sleep.

Megaman isn't the same without bryan, and street fighter isn't the same without francois.


Feels good to get into the normal flow of things again, yet weird.

I do miss our little paradise.

Last night after everything was over, it was party time, but the happiness of everything ending was slowly replaced by sadness.

It was weird, having a table of guys, men, sitting at a table with tears in eyes.

It was only 3 weeks, but some of us have became the best of friends. And even those whom we weren't close to, or disliked, had become part of a family.

A family which would be broken apart in a few hours.

And it hurt so much inside, I wanted to tear and cry too, but I couldn't. Like one of those sneezes that keeps evading you. Perhaps I will never be able to let myself cry again, no matter how much I want to.

I am forever cursed to express my sadness only on the piano.

Darren was right, how are we supposed to go on with life all of a sudden as if nothing has happened when in fact our lives have changed.

But we'll do it.

It may be over for now, but the memories will be for a lifetime.

Seperated by thousands and thousands of miles, we'll always have... the internet haha.

It was the experience of a lifetime alright. And as we all watch our family on tv next week all over the world, we're going to feel it all over again.

It takes removal of a variable for you to really appreciate that variable. Just like when I first left singapore.

I can't believe everything is finally back to normal. Running with Nitec, my computer, dota, music, training.

Life goes on, guys.